Random Roundup for the week of June 15, 2026

 2024 Study: Prevalence of autism among adults in Canada: results from a simulation modelling study

"Primary outcome measure National prevalence estimates of autistic adults living in private dwellings in Canada, with variations in prevalence by sex at birth and province/territory considered.

Results The findings suggest the prevalence of autism among adults in Canada to be 1.8% (95% SI 1.6%, 2.0%). National prevalence estimates by sex at birth were 0.7% (95% SI 0.6%, 0.9%) for females and 2.9% (95% SI 2.6%, 3.2%) for males. Provincial/territorial estimates ranged from 0.7% in Saskatchewan (95% SI 0.3%, 1.3%) to 3.6% in New Brunswick (95% SI 2.4%, 5.1%)."

This is written by the prof I would like to be my thesis advisor (if I change my degree for the thesis option) https://theconversation.com/will-attendance-based-grading-improve-school-absenteeism-281101

TIME SENSITIVE: The review panel on the lack of accessible housing in Canada is inviting all individuals and organizations to share their perspectives. The review panel is especially interested in hearing from people directly affected by this issue, service providers, and experts in housing, human rights, and accessibility. Submissions will be accepted until June 22, 2026.  https://nhc-cnl.ca/review-panels/written-hearing

Great new resources on raising boys (in the context of preventing misogyny and red pill behaviour) https://www.whiteribbon.ca/raisingboys

Info on Ehlers-Danlos you can take to your doctor for assessment: https://www.ehlers-danlos.com/assessing-joint-hypermobility/

Legislation I follow that I think is important:

An Act to amend the Criminal Code  https://www.parl.ca/LegisInfo/en/bill/45-1/C-225

An Act to establish a national framework for women’s health in Canada https://www.parl.ca/LegisInfo/en/bill/45-1/S-243

An Act respecting Caribbean Heritage Month https://www.parl.ca/LegisInfo/en/bill/45-1/S-248

I encourage you to submit briefs to any and all Bills that are important to you. If you'd like to know how, I'm happy to teach anyone. 

What I Have Learned About Speaking Up and Out

I have been, at times, scared to speak up about certain things. I think a lot of people share this problem. Some of us, depending on the situation, may be more at ease commenting about certain topics more than others.

A dark grey megaphone picto with the words, "speak out!" in white on a light red watercolour background.

Sometimes on Facebook, I was scared of sharing some of my views, in case it offends family members who I rarely see or know very well. But over time, I started to let pieces out. I think also I've learnt that I don't have to disclose everything about myself in order to stand up for others. Standing up for homosexuals having equal rights doesn't make me a homosexual anymore than speaking out against routine circumcision means I have a penis. I think some of my initial hesitancy was because I didn't want people to think that perhaps I was some of the things I was standing up for. (Which, of course, was my issue to work through)

What I've also discovered, much to my delight, is how many people were already in my camp, but either could not or did not speak up. Of course, we all use social media for different reasons. I happen to be very political on mine, but I also share cute animal pictures. What I've come to understand is that even if people aren't necessarily posting and speaking out, they still carry those thoughts with them. For them, it is safer and easier to simply "like" or comment on something I said, rather than to say it themselves. I think this is ok, as everyone has their limits. There are times when the rallying of the troops is necessary and hopefully they will allow their voices to be heard, but it is still heartening to me to see those "likes" and comments and know I'm not alone.

I know I do it to let others know they're not alone. I do it to see who's in my camp, many of whom I didn't expect. I do it to share ideas. I do it for discussions and for others to keep me accountable. I do it for those who have no voice. I do it to keep learning. 

I Am Not A Tireless Advocate

There are so many amazing Autistic self-advocates out there and to some extent, I do feel like one. At the same time, I don't feel like I have the same amount of energy and time to participate as much as I would like, so I have to leave some effort up to others.

Also, I don't feel like I necessarily fit in with some of the advocacy crowd. I have learned very quickly that trying to play Devil's Advocate or see a situation from all sides, gets me into trouble with some. There's a lot of all-or-nothing-black-and-white thinking - which is a really autistic trait, but also not always the best when it comes to making well-rounded arguments. "No, because I said so" doesn't quite cut it in the outside world.

I am passionate and political. I am very clear on my stance on vaccinations (please get them!), circumcision (please don't!), use of the R-word (please don't!), and basically always fighting for equality when it comes to race, sex, sexual orientation, gender, disabilities/abilities, and neurodiversity. I could probably add more, but you get my drift. That's a lot of causes to be involved in.

I do my best to engage in meaningful dialogue and call people out when I can, but I am not a tireless advocate. There are also still times where I do not feel like I have enough privilege to speak up. There are times where I don't have the words to speak up, and there are still other times where I am simply too emotional to speak up effectively. I'm not even going to detail those situations because they are honestly too disturbing for me to want to relive and not useful here anyway.

I suppose I can be hard on myself for not doing more, but it's also ok to ask for help and let some others who are stronger carry the burden sometimes. I have hope that the world won't always be this way - by that I don't mean we will never need advocates (though that would be lovely), but that we can get to a place where I feel like I have more power than I do now. That is my simple wish. 

Thank Goodness For Advocacy

The great thing I noticed from reading Autistic self-advocates is how open minded they are and how they (we) consider issues of equality in all ways. In other words, these people are not just fighting for their own rights, but also for everyone's. You'll see essays against racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, ageism, and pretty much any other -ism out there.

That's pretty much how I live my life, and in the same vein, how I run this blog. It's always been the way I've thought - justice for all - and I wonder if it's just a facet of how a very logical Autistic brain works or maybe the open mindedness is one of our traits.

I've always played Devil's advocate and try to understand both sides of a story. I've always made friends with the underdogs and people no one else wanted to be friends with. Maybe because I related to them or because they just accepted me for who I am. 

 It doesn't really matter, I'm just impressed and grateful.

So I'd like to say thanks to all of those who fight daily against injustice. Your passion, energy and devotion are commendable. Because of you dedicated people, we all benefit. Thank you for standing up and speaking for those of us who cannot, for whatever reason.

Thank you to everyone who reads and learns more about all issues. We don't always have to agree, but a simple, "I hear you and you matter" make all the difference.

Thank you to all those who have opened their eyes to a new way of thinking and changed any harmful or negative beliefs or actions. Whether it's something like not using the r-word or not engaging in abusive behaviour, what matters is that you are moving forward in a new light and trying to be a better person. Don't be too hard on yourself for past mistakes.

Lastly, I'm so grateful this community exists. I've gotten to know so many amazing people and learned so much. Thank you!

Bridging The Gap Between Autism Parents and Autistic People

If you've been either blogging or reading autism blogs for a while, you'll see there's a divide between "Autism Parents" (usually moms, but I don't want to be exclusionary to dads, grandparents or guardians) and Autistic individuals. I hear complaints from many "Autism Parents" who don't understand why they are not fully accepted into the Autistic community. There are obviously some who manage to get an "in," but those who don't, don't understand what they're doing wrong. I'm going to try and break it down and hopefully bring some understanding.

#WatchYourLanguage

I've been using the hashtag #WatchYourLanguage on Twitter recently, as well as linking to dictionary definitions of words people are using to describe Autistic people. If you are going to talk about us or to us, we ask you to use the words we have chosen for ourselves and those that do not cause harm. Realize that even if words are not a big deal to you, they can actually cause emotional harm and even trigger PTSD in some people. Many Autistic people are very precise about the words they choose (in fact, I've always been obsessed with that) so we really do mean what we say. Mean what you say and say what you mean while being cognizant of the power of your words.

Believe us when we say certain words can hurt.

Homosexual people don't like hearing "gay" as an insult, and disabled people don't like hearing "retarded." You know that. You understand that, right? Now also notice how some Black people don't want to be called "colored" or "African-American," but others are ok with that. It can be confusing, but it's not really if you simply respect what the individual wants to be called. If you are not sure, you can ask. I understand you can't always get it right (hey, even I don't!) but you can still make the effort to try. The vast majority of Autistic people I have been in contact with (including me), prefer being referred to as Autistic and not Person With Autism. If you stick with Autistic Person, you will offend way fewer Autistics than Person With Autism. If Person With Autism is pasted all over your blog/writing, we will assume that you are a "curebie" and don't respect us. If you want us to on your side, you need to get with the least hurtful lingo for the majority.

Respect our authority

We are the authorities of our experiences. We've had good and bad experiences in life. You do not get to dismiss the ones you don't like to hear about because it touches a cord with you. If you made a mistake, learned something new, and want to make a change in the way you parent as a result of what you learned, then great! Don't beat yourself up about the past. If you feel guilty (or think that by sharing our experiences we are guilting you) that is not about us -  it's about you. You do not get to take out that frustration on us. Do not discount how bad something was for us because you do it (or did it) and don't like yourself for it.

Stop acting like every day is a huge trial and tribulation

It's ok to complain - we all have bad days - but all your bad days can't be blamed on autism. Sometimes kids just act up and it's because they're kids, not specifically because they're autistic kids. Remember that your child is still a child, like any other child. There may be a few exceptions here and there, but in general, you can't blame every issue on autism. Some of it is just childhood and some of it can also be bad parenting.

Stop looking for cures

Is your child dying from cancer? By all means, hold a fundraiser for cancer research. Is your child autistic? Get over it. (This also applies to people trying to change homosexual people into heterosexual people) You can't change brains. You don't get to pick a new brain for your kid because you don't like the brain he/she has. The sooner you get that and love and accept the child you did get, the better everyone will be. With acceptance, you can learn how to best provide assistance. If your child were deaf, you would probably get them a hearing aid and maybe also learn sign language. They may be a good candidate for a cochlear implant, but they still won't hear sound the way the majority does. Certain aids will make life easier for them, but they will still always be somewhat hard of hearing. On their own they may adapt by learning to read lips, if that works for them. In the end, they become adults and communicate in the way they prefer. So by all means, focus on giving your child lots of options to make life easier, but don't waste your time trying to change them fundamentally. It just won't happen. An even bigger take away is, many of us wouldn't want that to happen.

We are not trapped, lost or oblivious

We are not trapped in our minds or lost in our own world. We are not oblivious to the world around us. If anything, we feel it more deeply and with more mindfulness and connection than most NTs (don't people learn meditation for that purpose?). We hear when you're talking about us within earshot. Let me repeat: we hear everything you say when you think we're not listening. And if we don't like what you said, then we have no reason to respect or want to listen to any more of it. Would you want to talk to someone who talks negatively about you right in your presence?

Stop making excuses for the inexcusable

You need more services for your child? Write letters, call representatives, stage a protest, do what you've got to do! But don't use a horrible senseless murder as your opportunity to gain support for your cause. There are few things that will make me question whose side you're really on more than having compassion or sympathy for a murderer. There are plenty of positive things you can do to raise awareness, without aligning yourself with negative actions.

I'm not a puzzle piece

I'm different, I'll admit, but I'm not a missing piece of a puzzle that needs to be completed. I am not the piece that doesn't fit. I am not a lost piece or mistakenly put in the box of the wrong set. If that's what you think, I don't want to talk to you. It's that simple.

Do not tell us we can't understand

Do not argue with us and then decide we cannot possibly understand because we're autistic and lack empathy or "theory of mind" or IQ. That's like a punch below the belt. It's demeaning, insulting and again, it lacks respect for us being the authorities of our experiences.

The main point here is we all make mistakes at times. The first step is becoming aware of your speech and actions. The second is doing something about it. Make amends, apologize (especially to your children), edit, delete or rewrite blog posts or tweets that don't fit your new ideals. Seek out genuine friendships with the people you want to learn from and accept them the way they are. I certainly don't agree with every single person I encounter, but I can take their good points with their flaws, especially when they are making an effort towards more good.

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