September 22, 2014

On That Adoption Journey

family walking hand in hand on
Maybe one day we'll be a family of four?

I think it's been YEARS since I mentioned anything about our fostering/adoption journey, which is a shame because I know some people were specifically following me for updates. Sorry for the let-down!

Quite honestly, we needed to get our own lives more sorted out before trying to add more to the mix. Also, after our two fostering info sessions, we weren't exactly running to sign up. I started the paperwork and Hubby just couldn't get into it. So we dropped that idea and decided to give it time to think about what we wanted.

At the beginning of summer, we decided to revisit international adoption again. I looked into a few agencies and then decided we would wait until next year to start pursuing that. But then, as life has a way of doing, we got a surprise call from Youth Services asking us if we wanted to proceed with local adoption. We had put ourselves on the list three years earlier and we figured we would never hear from them!

So we went to that info session and decided to start the process. We figured we'd see what pans out. We had two months to get all our paperwork done: we needed police background checks, financial statements, medicals, and references for all of us (yes, even the Little Man). It was a bit of running around, but we got it all in.
Thanks to our friends for agreeing to answer questionnaires!  

Then we waited two months. 

We got another call recently, telling us they will proceed with the home study now. So this morning we had our first meeting in the home. The case worker (social worker?) checked out the place to make sure we had enough room for another child and that everything was safe. We also answered some questions together (Hubby and I).

I was impressed that it was important to her that we learn the proper language when talking about adoption. "First Mother" instead of "Birth Mother" and "relinquishing parental rights" not "giving up a child." It speaks to the activist deep inside me. We spoke about how it is the child's story and they can choose who they want to tell it to and how. 

So unlike the fostering info sessions we went to, which Hubby described as, "two nights of horror stories," we feel somewhat more comfortable with this. 

From there, we still all need to have individual interviews conducted. We have them scheduled over the next month. And then, if we get through all that, I think we just wait some more. When a baby becomes available, we will be called and told what they know about the parents (if the mother drank alcohol, what ethnic background they are from, the sex of the baby etc) and then we have to decide whether we want that one or not. If we say yes, we either go straight to the hospital (if it requires special care) or we get it directly from the hospital. That's it - wham bam, baby in your hands! lol 

And then we go from one day, being a "normal" family, with our jobs and routines, to suddenly having a newborn in the house. I'm sure it will be a bizarre mix of emotions - and running out to buy diapers and formula! But I figure most stores are open late enough that this is just a detail. And I still have the Little Man's old cloth diapers anyway. 

But that's all just a glimmer in my eye in some other time unknown....

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