How Have I Been?

Basically, I felt I needed more job security, so since September I've been working a second (part time) job. So I'm doing about 12 hours extra work a week over my full time job.

After a year of seeing doctors and trying to figure out my abdominal pains, we've finally discovered I have tumours on my liver, right ovary and uterus.

The month of November has been filled with death: just found out today a fifth member of my family has died. I feel like all I do is shop for flowers and baskets for people.

I spent the day at my great-aunt's funeral. I'm drained and tired and headachey. But I got to spend time with my British cousins, which is always fun.

I got a letter home from the Little Man's school that head lice is going around. Oh yay!

So goes the roller coaster of my life.

I Fear Death, Not Autism

My best friend's daughter, who I consider to be my "honorary niece" is allergic to a whole bunch of things. She's allergic to wheat, milk, pineapple and eggplant. She's deathly allergic to eggs and soy. She carries an Epipen.

They actually discovered the egg allergy after she had an allergic reaction to a vaccine. Luckily, that reaction wasn't deadly, but since many vaccines are made using egg albumen, it means she cannot get vaccinated.

This doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the vaccine. Her reaction to it is not because the vaccine is bad. Also, her body reacting this way to common foods does not make her bad. It's just the way her body works. In fact, as long as she doesn't eat (or get injected with) any of her allergens, she's a wonderful and bright little girl.

Because she cannot get vaccinated, she needs to rely on the people who can get vaccinated to reduce the spread of deadly illnesses, hopefully reducing her chances of catching one. And that terrifies me because so many people are opting not to vaccinate because they fear autism more than death.

I don't fear autism. You can live a long and healthy life with autism. But I do fear one of my family members or friends dying from an illness that can be prevented. And I really shouldn't be having these types of worries in this day and age.

I am scared because despite my son being vaccinated, I know he could still get measles or whooping cough from someone who didn't get vaccinated. I don't like the idea of my son suffering from a potentially fatal disease. I especially don't want him to suffer from a preventable disease when we've taken all the precautions available to us, but others didn't. I certainly don't want him to be left with scars or permanent damage caused by surviving such an illness.

I wonder, is it selfish of me to want kids to be healthy? Is it bad of me to wish everyone who could get vaccinated does, so they protect everyone? I usually am "live and let live" about most things, but in this case when people don't get vaccinated, they're potentially stopping me and those I love from living. That's not really fair.

You may also be interested in reading: Vaccines Scarier Than Illnesses

Safe Bed, Safe Baby

Did you hear the story of the eight-month-old baby who died because of her bed? This is just so so sad.

In this case, the parents really thought they were doing things right and they had the advice of a social worker. It's really just tragic!

I am a huge proponent of both bed sharing and co-sleeping. I really believe babies need to be near their parents. I understand wanting an adult life back, but to be honest, babyhood is so short; it's not really that long in the grand scheme of things. It's not like they'll be teenagers and still hanging out in your bed.

I think the lesson here is to make beds as safe as possible and to check on your baby regularly. Even when so small, they sure can move around a lot! Don't underestimate the power of a little one!

I feel sorry for this family and I hope they find peace.

Out The Mouths of Babes

I am a beach bum and I'm happy my son inherited my love of the sand and sea. Maybe it's because I took him to Barbados when he was only 3.5 months old or maybe it's in his genes. I don't know, but I'm glad he likes the heat and water like I do.

We've also taken family vacations to Florida three times so far and plan to go back at Christmas. I keep a magnet and postcard of Fort Lauderdale beach up on our fridge to remind us of good times and weather. Recently, the Little Man has been demanding to see them and he points at them and says, "beach! Go now!"

One evening, we decided to talk to him more about it. He was adamant and persistent, without getting frustrated (good on him!) to get us to understand what he was saying. After a lot of jumbled, incomprehensible sentences came out of him, we broke it down from the beginning.

He said, "beach. Me happy and Dada happy."
Ok, but what about Mama? Wasn't she happy, too?
"No," he said. "Grandpa go in wawa, say 'Bye-bye!'"

Oh my goodness! I couldn't believe what came out of his mouth!

Fighting back tears, I said, "yes, you're right. We put Grandpa in the water and said 'Bye-Bye.' Mama was sad."
"Go see Grandpa!" he demanded.
"No, we can't see Grandpa. He's dead. Maybe he can see you right now, but you can't see him. You can see his picture...."
And by then he was distracted by something else.

It's just amazing because the Little Man is almost three now and he's talking about my sister and I pouring my father's ashes in the sea in Barbados when he was just 16.5 months old.

He sat on the beach and played in the sand while my hubby watched him and took pictures of the whole event.

There he is playing happily. Who would have thought his brain was busy burning this memory into his brain?
It's amazing and I'm glad he remembers this and his Grandpa.

Just goes to show, you never know what will come out the mouths of babes :)

Group B Strep Awareness Month

July is almost over, but it's Group B Strep Awareness Month.

I'm sure you were probably tested before giving birth and didn't think anything of it. I know I didn't. I was told if I tested positive, I would be given antibiotics during labour. I figured it's probably not a big deal. I was negative anyway, but I never realized until I read this article how horrible and deadly it can be - even if you test negative.

Click on the link to read a story of one woman's loss and tremendous courage to continue to educate others.

Pass it on to all the expectant moms you know.