We Have A Disabled Parking Pass For A Reason

We have a disabled parking pass for a reason - now stop giving us the stink-eye!

We've only had our disabled parking pass for a few months, but we've already noticed it causes people to stare at us (more than normally) and sometimes give us dirty looks.

I get it, none of us are elderly. None of us use a wheelchair or walking aids. None of us "look" disabled, whatever that may mean to most.

I went through the legal process to get one like anyone else. I paid the fee and had a doctor sign off on it. The government approved it and issued it. It's not like I found one on the black market.

I got it because every once and a while, the Little Man has a penchant for bolting. Ok, not really a penchant, but a tendency. It happens when he gets angry or upset usually. He's not an eloper or a wanderer. He's a runner.

He tends to do it when things are not going his way - and a common scenario for that would be when we quickly have to leave a store because he wants every shiny item in it and if we stay there, things will break (I've had that happen. Luckily, no one made me pay for damages!)

So then the next logical thing would be to exit the store and run away from me, usually into a parking lot. I think we can all agree this is not safe. So rather than having to drag a screaming, unpredictable, potential-bolter through a parking lot and hope for the best, we applied for a disabled parking pass so we would always have the closest parking to the door. Because I don't want my kid to get hit by a car.

I know I don't have to explain myself or justify myself to anyone (or at least, I shouldn't!) but I have to admit, being stared at or given the stink-eye by strangers is kinda annoying. I'm not writing this for people who understand not all disabilities are visible. I'm not writing this for people who get that everyone has a story. I'm not writing this for people who understand some parents will do anything and everything in their power to keep their kids safe.

I'm writing for those who don't think, or haven't ever considered the possibility, that disabled parking is not a privilege afforded, but a RIGHT to make sure disabled people, whatever their disability, have safe and easy access to every public place, just like anyone else.

I will keep taking him out - I will not hide him in my house in order to make other people more comfortable - and one day he will get to a point where he won't bolt. When that day comes, I will gratefully give up our disabled parking pass and be thankful there are systems in place that make sure we are treated with equality. 

Thank Goodness For Advocacy

The great thing I noticed from reading Autistic self-advocates is how open minded they are and how they (we) consider issues of equality in all ways. In other words, these people are not just fighting for their own rights, but also for everyone's. You'll see essays against racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, ageism, and pretty much any other -ism out there.

That's pretty much how I live my life, and in the same vein, how I run this blog. It's always been the way I've thought - justice for all - and I wonder if it's just a facet of how a very logical Autistic brain works or maybe the open mindedness is one of our traits.

I've always played Devil's advocate and try to understand both sides of a story. I've always made friends with the underdogs and people no one else wanted to be friends with. Maybe because I related to them or because they just accepted me for who I am. 

 It doesn't really matter, I'm just impressed and grateful.

So I'd like to say thanks to all of those who fight daily against injustice. Your passion, energy and devotion are commendable. Because of you dedicated people, we all benefit. Thank you for standing up and speaking for those of us who cannot, for whatever reason.

Thank you to everyone who reads and learns more about all issues. We don't always have to agree, but a simple, "I hear you and you matter" make all the difference.

Thank you to all those who have opened their eyes to a new way of thinking and changed any harmful or negative beliefs or actions. Whether it's something like not using the r-word or not engaging in abusive behaviour, what matters is that you are moving forward in a new light and trying to be a better person. Don't be too hard on yourself for past mistakes.

Lastly, I'm so grateful this community exists. I've gotten to know so many amazing people and learned so much. Thank you!